How a Wife Can Encourage Her Husband in His Role as a Father {Guest Post}


With Father's day coming up {June 21st!}, I thought this would be a great time to feature a guest post on encouraging our husbands in their role as father.

Today's guest post was written by Jeremy Brummel. You can read more from Jeremy on his blog, and don't forget to find him on Facebook, Twitter, and Instagram!

As a wife, one of the greatest things that you can do on a regular basis is be an encouragement to your husband.

More than two years ago, my wife and I found out that we were expecting our first child. At first, I was stoked! I had been looking forward to being a father and could not wait to hold our first child.

A few months later we found out that we were having a baby boy. Yeah! But then it dawned on me; he is going to grow up with me as his main role model and would in turn, most likely, imitate me. Yikes! The pressure of knowing that every action and word I said would help to mold who my child would become terrified me and sometimes, still does.

In July of 2013 we had our firstborn son. What a joy this ride has become. I wish you could meet my two boys. That’s right, two, we had our second baby boy just this past November. For those of you trying to do the math, yes they are close, they are 16 months a part. Both boys are some of the most smiley, enthusiastic children you have ever met, dimples and all!

I love being a husband and father. But it is not always easy. I worry about providing for them in many ways, financially, physically, emotionally, but especially in leading them and teaching them to follow Christ along with other life skills. Each day brings its own journey.

Often between work, the busyness of life, and home, we can feel empty as fathers. What keeps us going?

One of the main things is encouragement from our spouse.

You may be asking, what are some ways a wife can encourage her husband?

Make a list. Actually, several lists.

List out the things that he does for either you or your children, things that you have noticed or appreciate, whether big or small. This can be a one-time thing or something he does on a consistent basis. A second list could be foods or restaurants that he likes.

Another could be movies he likes or activities that he enjoys doing. Maybe watching an action movie, or comedy. He also might enjoy fishing, reading, being with you, etc. If you are not sure, take the time to listen to him.

List out some things that he likes. Maybe this can be made into a few lists. Finally, list item(s) on his wish list, maybe a book, place or specific item he wants.

Pick something from the list of things that he does and tell him why you appreciate him.

It could be written on a note he finds on the steering wheel of his car on the way to work. Maybe though a card, or just tell/show your gratefulness after he completes the project. Let him know why you love and appreciate him. Give him examples and do it often. Men need to hear or read these words of encouragement. Your encouragement helps us and lets us know that we are leading and serving our family the right way and that you have noticed. It helps us know that what we are doing does make a difference and pushes us to do more.

Pick something from one of the lists under things that he likes and make plans for him to do it or receive the item of his liking.

Sometimes this means that you are not a part of these plans and that’s ok. There are times that a guy needs to either be alone or have a guy’s night. Use your creativity with what his needs and wants are.

Your support through words of affirmation, your loving touch, your attitude, and your actions will go a long way in providing the encouragement that is much needed for your husband.

These lists will help you personalize your encouragement for your husband rather than something canned and impersonal.

I would love to hear from you!

What are some ways that you have encouraged your husband in the past that have been successful?

Jeremy's bio: I am a student pastor in Marietta Georgia. I am married to my beautiful wife Stephanie and we have two young boys. I love seeing people come to faith in Christ and being discipled. I blog about practical, spiritual living.

Twitter/ @JeremyBrummel

Instagram/ @JeremyBrummel